Blush + Bashful

It seems like everywhere we look these days, we’re hearing the same thing…Americans are worried about their finances. And for good reason! Apparently we are in the midst of the greatest financial crisis in American history since the Great Depression and things are going to get worse before they get better. Before you decide that hosting a wedding in these hard times is hopeless and you give up the dream of having all of your family and friends in the same room toasting to your new marriage, let’s talk about how to make this happen on a budget.

Now, let it be known that budget weddings are not a new phenomenon. Penny pinching brides and grooms have been getting married for years. Ask your parents about their wedding day and you’ll probably hear about a cake and punch reception in the church basement! Now, I’m not suggesting that you forget about the dream wedding that you’ve been planning since you were a little girl. But, please! Be smart about how you spend your money. A wedding isn’t a necessity, as much as I’d like for it to be!

Here are a few trends I’ve noticed that are helping couples through these rough times:

Longer engagements allow couples to save up money, get their #1 choice in venues and vendors, complete DIY projects, and plan for their future together.

Shorter engagements give couples just enough time to find what they need, but not enough time to go overboard with the elaborate ideas and spending.

Smaller guest lists are hands-down the most effective way to save money.  Each guest at your wedding costs hundreds of dollars! Do you really need to have all of your co-workers at your reception?

Second receptions are becoming more popular for those guests who didn’t make the cut for the expensive reception. Consider hosting a brunch, cocktail party, or BBQ at your home to celebrate with all of the folks who were left out of the other celebration. Emily Post would hate this idea, but…she’s rich!

Creative decor ideas help keep the floral bill in check. Spend some time at your favorite discount store, flea market, or garage sale to see what beautiful items you can find to incorporate into your centerpieces. Our team can help set up these items for a nominal charge.

Interesting venue choices! Start asking questions at your favorite places that don’t typically host weddings. They may have never thought about hosting weddings or, they may have always wanted to get into weddings but they didn’t know where to start. We recently hosted my brother’s wedding reception at a fabulous miniature golf course in Central IL!

Look to the suburbs or small cities nearby to save thousands of dollars on your reception.  Just 20-30 minutes outside of the Chicago, prices drop up to 40%. Look into Rockford, St. Louis, Madison, Milwaukee, or other cities and towns that may be special to your family.

Smaller Bands or DJs are being hired to help keep the cost down. Rather than blowing out everyone’s eardrums with a ten piece orchestra, consider using a five piece band or a DJ for your party.

Throw an Anniversary Party.  Financial Guru, Suze Orman, advises couples to get married quietly and buy a house with the money they would have spent. After 5 years together, throw an anniversary party to celebrate your success. (And, call us to help!)

I’m not suggesting that if your finances are fine you do any of this! Good for you if you are able to host a lavish affair with 400 of your nearest and dearest during these hard times. Everyone will be overjoyed to attend a swanky celebration where you are footing the bill for a gourmet meal and unlimited champagne. The average Joe doesn’t get out as much as he used to, after all!

Some mornings as I check my email and start working, I have a talk show on in the background. Today on the Mike & Juliet Show, they did a segment called “Relationships 101″ that reviewed what is considered “normal” before, on, and after your wedding day.

Here are a few sample questions:

Is it normal to get cold feet before the wedding day?

Is it normal to invite your ex to the wedding?

Check out the videos online to get the scoop:

Part One

Part Two

We all know that brides-to-be love to pamper themselves with spa treatments, manicures, massages, and the like. It’s the one time in their lives when they don’t have to feel guilty for such shameless self-indulgence. Grooms have gotten the short of the stick…until recently! A new crop of salons that tailor to men have popped up in Chicago. This gives guys another option, in addition to golf, for a pre-wedding bonding activity.

If your guy is in need of some serious rejuvenation, consider sending him to one of these swanky, but manly retreats:

316 Barber Spa This fabulous place features vintage Vegas-style atmosphere complete with pool tables and flat-screen tvs.

Halo Chicago  With three locations in Chicago, this hip guys-only salon has six different packages aimed at grooming the groom!

American Male  The least fancy of the three, American Male would put even the most skeptical of grooms at ease.

Bonus! On a recent episode of “Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood,” Tori surprised her hubby with a daddy shower at a Barber Spa. He and his friends were treated to straight-razor shaves and great haircuts. What a fun idea! I believe that they went to The Shave Shop in LA.

After three years of wonderful luck…Blush & Bashful had our first truly rainy wedding day. Sure, we’ve had days where it sprinkled or threatened rain, or started pouring after the outdoor events were over. However, we’ve never had a true deluge like we had this past Saturday. Rather than panicking, we put in place our rain plan and the day went off very well.

Here are Blush & Bashful’s top ten tips for a fabulous rainy day wedding:

1) Golf umbrellas! Purchase ten to twenty 62″(or larger) golf umbrellas for your guests and bridal party members to use throughout the day. Don’t plan to get all of them back at the end of the night, though! Umbrellas have a way of walking off…

2) Assign helpful friends to escort your guests to and from their vehicles with the golf umbrellas. Your guests will be so grateful!

3) Call ahead. Let someone at your ceremony and reception sites know when you are arriving so they can be sure to greet you with an umbrella and an open door. Or, arrange for a friend to take over this responsibility.

4) Dress at your ceremony site, if possible. It’s one less opportunity for your gown to be soaked.

5) Get an updo! Even if you’ve been growing out your gorgeous hair for years for your wedding, the humidity on a rainy day will make it look less than perfect. An updo is more easily controlled!

6) Bring a change of shoes so your white satin Stuart Weitzman’s don’t get ruined. Make it white wellies!

7) Having a rain plan for any outdoor photos is pretty standard, but no one thinks to get permission to take photos at those indoor locations! Often you’ll need to get a permit or talk to a specific person to gain access.

8 ) If you want to have photos at outdoor locations in the rain, talk to your photographer to be sure he/she has an assistant on hand to hold the umbrella over the expensive photography equipment. Rainy day wedding photos are beautiful!

9) Don’t focus on the rain! Is there anything more boring than talking about the weather? If your guests mention the weather to you, smile, shrug, and change the subject.

10) You knew I’d say this…relax and focus on what matters most!

I am on the email list from BFF Bridal, a New York based online publication and high-end consultancy for chic city brides. Today’s email was particularly cute, so I thought I’d share!

You can check out BFF Bridal and sign up for the newsletter at www.bffbridal.com.

EVER AFTER

It’s the start of a brand-new year, and everyone’s resolving to do more of this and less of that. So we asked couples who have been married from mere months to many decades to dish out their expert advice on what it takes to be happily hitched . . .

. . . In Your First Year of Marriage: He says: “Don’t say you don’t care when it comes to choosing photos for the wedding album.” She says: “Have a plan for writing the thank-you notes.”
-Julie & Craig Stolzberg, married August 11, 2007

. . . In Your Seventh Year of Marriage: He says: “Keep up the small but romantic things you did for each other in the beginning.” She says: “Accept that your way isn’t the only way.”
-Cindy & Jack Manelli, married March 24, 2001

. . . In Your Tenth Year of Marriage: He says: “Always put the marriage first . . . even before the kids. The kids will understand and be better for it anyway. Also, buy her a handbag or shoes at least once a year.” She says: “Do your own things as well as spend quality time together. Be a united front for your kids; remember to do nice things for each other; and always try to compromise.”
-Nicole & Jacob Capps, married July 4, 1998

. . . In Your Twenty-Eighth Year of Marriage: He says: “Humor. You have to laugh WITH each other and AT each other.” She says: “Fight when you’re angry. Scream, yell, throw things. Then move on. No festering is allowed.”
-Tammie & John Collins, married December 20, 1980

. . . In Your Forty-Second Year of Marriage: He says: “Mutual respect and consideration. Also: understand the little things that either please or irritate your partner, and remember to act accordingly.” She says: “Work hard, play hard, and every few years make it a point to take on new activities together.”
-Pam & Glen Hait, married January 15, 1966

. . . In Your Fiftieth Year of Marriage: He says: “It takes a strong faith, commitment to each other, and a special love for your children.” She says: “Faith, support and commitment.”
-Dorothy & Joe D’Autorio, married May 31, 1958

. . . In Your Fifty-Fifth Year of Marriage: He says: “My formula is Communication + Respect = Love.” She says: “Continued love and respect.”
-Freida & Joe Sokol, married June 17, 1953

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